The Power in Telling a Man 'NO'

August 16, 2016 by Miss T.N. King in 'Sincerely KING' Blog, Uncategorized

"NO" is one of the most powerful, yet underused words in the dictionary. Perhaps you were once like me, a "yes woman". You go out your way to make others happy; you're overly accommodating. Sometimes you find yourself biting off more than you can chew. You try to please everyone, even at the risk of inconveniencing yourself. You prove your loyalty and support by always being there and saying "yes". You rarely say NO and the few times you say it, it would always be followed by the word "but". "No, BUT...*insert another way to overextend yourself*."

I don't know about you, but it seemed like the more I said "yes", the more I was taken for granted. I turned into a doormat. I felt powerless and unappreciated. I went from being the priority to the option. I was served grade A shit on a silver platter and expected to eat it (unfortunately, some days I did). And like a dusty pair of flared jeans from '07, I was just hanging in the closet waiting for him to put me on. Eventually I grew courage and developed the strength to say NO--sometimes HELL NO if I was really fed up. Then something magical happened: I was able to reclaim my power.

What If You Never Meet 'The One'?

July 06, 2016 by Miss T.N. King in 'Sincerely KING' Blog, Uncategorized

I've spent my entire life under the assumption that one day I'll meet my King and become his Queen. I've spent all of my relationships putting forth endless effort--gluing broken pieces just to still have an ornament of love. I've spent my season of singleness trying to be a "virtuous" woman--remaining God-fearing, abstaining from sex for 4+ years, encouraging/uplifting others, loving without limits, being moral, etc. Then it finally hit me, "I'm doing all of this and I still may never find my life partner to share mutual love, romance, commitment and companionship. Is it even worth abstaining from sex in hopes of sharing a special moment with a man that may not exist? Does being the good girl really pay off?" To this very day, these type of questions haunt me. My last serious committed relationship ended 4 years ago. Never in a million years I thought I would remain a single woman for the next 4+ years, or not find someone who cares about me as much as I care about them. After all, I've always been considered a great catch--the good ones don't get left behind right? While I was in deep thought I asked myself, "What happens if you don't find your life partner in another 4 years, and then 4 more years after that, and so forth? How does life look for you? Will you hit rock bottom and act erratically because your prayers have remained unanswered? Will you settle for some man that you don't truly love for the sake of companionship? Will you let your self-confidence diminish and believe you're not enough?"

What to Do When Your Dreams Reject You

May 13, 2016 by Miss T.N. King in 'Sincerely KING' Blog, Uncategorized

For those who follow me on social media know that I recently accepted a new job at my dream company and will be relocating to my dream city, NYC. However, you didn't know that before these dreams were manifested, I was rejected not once but twice from my dream company. My faith in God was constantly tested. I almost gave up on everything. Oh, and I went to bed numerous times feeling confused, disappointed, and frustrated. I've been working in my career field for more than a year and a half. I didn't know that climbing up the totem pole would be a rigorous journey. Society makes it seem like once your foot is finally in the door (aka once you finally get a job), you can smoothly sail to the top. That's a lie. Truth is, the struggle never ends even after you get a job. In this post, I want to be very transparent about my rocky journey and how I still became victorious after experiencing rejection from my dreams. This is my story. I remember it like it was yesterday when they flew me out for my first interview. Everything felt so right. The people, the culture, the city--I knew in my heart this company was for me. In fact, in my personal journal I declared that this year I would gain employment with this specific company, relocate to NYC, and triple my compensation.